This is what suddenly came into my mind today, after talking with a friend regarding looking for a job. What if your character is getting in between you getting a job? I’ve been told so many times that in Germany (but I guess pretty much everywhere else) looking for a job is about “selling” your skills. You need to package things right, or even exaggerate what you’re capable of, in order to attract the Human Resources people to hire you. Now I’m a person who isn’t really capable of doing so. If I think I’m good, I’ll say I’m good. If I think I just know of something, I’ll say I just know but not that much. I say things as it is. Exaggerating what I’m capable of makes me feel uncomfortable and insecure. What if I blabber too much and in the end I’m fired because I’m not as good as I advertised? Well, maybe its just my paranoia. But I really would hate myself for overly advertising myself especially when its not true. Like, I just finished my first art doll. And although I plan to sell them like I sell my plush toys, I can’t gather up the thought or feeling to say: “Look how good it looks” or “How cute it is”. Contrariwise, I know it looks quite good for a starter doll, especially for someone with no basic of sculpting and painting. However, I know how much I’m lacking and rather than blabbing about how talented I am, I’d rather look for online tutorials, or even buy them if necessary (I just did yesterday) and make myself better. The problem is, how would people know your quality if you don’t try to appeal yourself at all? I start to think, just a bit won’t hurt.
However, try to see it this way. This world, not just specifically just the job market, is a bakery. Or a bistro, whatever. You know most of the food is crap, cakes with delicious-looking cream that’s most likely just slime topped with another slime, cherry on top which most probably has a thousand micro-worms inside it. But they sell quite fast, and people probably won’t even notice what they just ate. And you, the one who knows that you’re worth more than that, never bother to make yourself look better, despite of how well you know how good you actually taste. You are sure someday someone like a culinary expert would have their eye on you and buy you. But how many people, even culinary experts, have that talent? What are the chances that they came to the stall you’re sitting and pick you up? One underlining here is: They can’t taste you. And you can’t make them do that, either. Not in the most chances, at least. I’ve seen people like this, as a “high quality cake” that looks plain, ended up in a trash bin. My dad is probably one of the very exceptions. Nevertheless, he’s from a totally different generation. This is a generation where “everything that meets the eye matters”.
So what do you do? Are you too proud to change? I’d say you better do. Not following the lead like everyone else, of course. Learn how to say things, how to put them together to sound interesting without exaggerating your capabilities. Take your time and you’ll find your tune. I’m also still trying to find mine. There are too many people out there who take credits they don’t deserve, despite they’re actually intelligent or not. I’ve seen a bit too much, I guess. But oh well, here goes. I just hope I found someone who finally got their eye on me. I’m putting the simplest topping on me now. I’ve been sitting here a little too long.